Hermitage is certainly a dark place. But there is also some light. Not much, but there still is. Here is what I learned about isolation throughout my ongoing hermitage:

 

1. It feels strange to not start the day checking out missed calls or messages. But eventually I got used to it.

 

2. It feels even stranger to no longer be connected to those people who have been a part of my everyday life for years now.

 

3. I do not know if my friends will still want to see me after my hermitage. I have ignored them completely for two months now – I have no idea how they reacted to this. Still, I will accept their choices, whatever those will be.

 

4. Solitude, and hermitage, are difficult to pull off without risking one’s mental health. I try, and I think I will succeed, because I have huge control over my mind.

 

5. It is easy to forget about isolation when I work, but much harder to forget when I rest.

 

6. Keeping my mind active – education is essential, so, during my hermitage, I have committed myself to studying art and music.

 

7. I appreciate little treats, a cake, a glass of wine, a delicious salad, much more than before. On the same note I learned how to bake muffins and how to make homemade chocolate, and homemade chocolates with filling, too.

 

8. Distancing myself from everyone is not easy, and controlling my mind so that I do not think too much about the regular life I had before this global crisis is even more difficult, but I still persist.

 

9. I learned to be grateful for all the little things. I write these down every day.

 

10. I am noticing more and more the power of something as simple as a haircut. If I look different, I can become a different person altogether. One of my flaws, which was quite debilitating, was anxiety. I had panic attacks almost every day. Now they are gone completely, once my hair was gone, my anxiety was gone too.

 

11. I am more connected to nature. I try to find beauty. In a world that loses its beauty at an alarming rate, nature is a place of contemplation, a retreat.

 

12. I am more curious about things. Again, knowledge is my companion during these dark times.

 

13. I am much more connected to my violin, Hermann. As you may have noticed, I am also more open about my process, and I share more about it.

 

Yours,
Medicine Madison